The thing is though, I’ve kind of came to the realization that it really is time for me to cut the crap and focus on really getting that sparkle back.

I’m excited about living life [...]]]> Yep, I’ve been off living my life in the real world, all the while forgetting my little place here on the interwebs.

The thing is though, I’ve kind of came to the realization that it really is time for me to cut the crap and focus on really getting that sparkle back.

I’m excited about living life to my best potential, and investing in myself so that I have a long, healthy and upbeat life.

So, without further ado, here I am at my first drawing day in forever, and (drum roll please), boo-whoooo, no makeupalley for 2 lbs!

My first step I created in a dream a couple nights ago. I mentioned in a previous post that I like instant gratification, so it really sparked something in me to create my own way to keep myself [...]]]> I’m getting started on this- it’s all coming to a big bang beginning on Monday, August 10, 2009.

My first step I created in a dream a couple nights ago. I mentioned in a previous post that I like instant gratification, so it really sparked something in me to create my own way to keep myself interested in this, while it will take some time to really see some signifigant loss.

What I have come up with is to wheel and deal with myself.

Here’s my first deal- I love makeup, as you will be sure to find out if you follow me on this journey. Well, I could have told myself that I could buy a new [fill in the blank] when I lose [insert amount] lbs, but that seemed old and overdone to me, plus I’m not trying to spend too much money during this process… at least not at first! So, what does a sparkle gal like myself need in life? Variety- I need lots of variety, and that is why I have boxes of makeup, that most people do not understand the reason behind. Ahhh, are you seeing where I am going here? Gasp if you will, but I just had my husband go through my box of “in rotation” lip products and I asked him to pick out just one. “Are you serious?” he asked. I think he knew where I was headed with this.

So, the deal is this, I only have this one little lipgloss to work with… until I lose two pounds. Pretty good, I think this fits me quite nicely.

You might ask, “Well, what lip gloss did he pick?” I have to tell you he has excellent taste. It’s actually one of my personal favorites- MAC Lustreglass in Flusterose. A nice smooth gloss from MAC- not nearly as sticky as the regular Lipglasses, yet still long lasting- a nice sheer, rosy pink with plenty of sparkle- very fitting indeed.

You might also think this is a little crazy, but I’ve been doing crazy dieting since the last day of my fifth grade year in elementary school, so why not try something different?

I gotta tell you, it was a little surreal for me to dump out my “travel” makeup bag tonight- you know that bag full of goodies that I take with me everywhere. It’s going to be odd not having a bunch of options, but I think it really will make me work harder!

I can’t deny it, I am really getting excited, and I hope you will join me on this journey, and I hope I inspire someone, even if it really is just one person!

One word, one question, yet such a hard one to answer.

Why is it that I know something is wrong, that something is not good for me, yet I still do it?  The thing is I really feel that there is something different about the way my brain works than the way my skinny friends’ brains [...]]]> Why?

One word, one question, yet such a hard one to answer.

Why is it that I know something is wrong, that something is not good for me, yet I still do it?  The thing is I really feel that there is something different about the way my brain works than the way my skinny friends’ brains work. I am consistently worrying about food, what I should eat, what I shouldn’t eat, when will I eat, how much will I eat, and how much should I really eat, where will we eat when we go out later, what do I want to eat- oh wow. Now, you ask someone else, my friend who is naturally skinny, “Do you think about food a lot?” ‘Nope,” is the answer I get. Amazing.  I mean, this has got to mean something, right?

I should be asleep, but I keep thinking. My brain is at war. I keep going back and forth, back and forth- what should I do, what plan should I pick- back and forth.

I need to stop, and it’s as simple as that. I need to be smart and use my God Given common sense.

I’m going to bed, and as I drift off to sleep I will be thinking about some stuff, preparing myself for launch.